All The Joy You Can Stand Book Review
Updated: Jun 20, 2019
Author Debrena shares 101 Sacred Power Principles for Making Joy Real in Your Life. These principles are practical and trigger deeper connection within oneself. Her perception on joy, life, spiritual well-being, emotional well-being, and wellness is beyond the surface level of self-help.
This book inspires you to do the work. I was not expecting or anticipating to put my life on hold for the things she was going to share in this book. This book is an amazing book to take on a retreat, or to do some quiet time with yourself, or to do some soul searching.
I am glad I did not anticipate it because then I would have not picked it up because I was in the middle of other type of work. But at the end I'm glad I did and it came in perfect timing because I think my soul was searching for this type of book. It needed this book. It needed to do soul-connection work because it had been neglected for quite some time.
One of the exercises that I took away that made the most impact in my life was principle number 58: Turning Points. In this principle she shares the twenty-five turning points passages by Reverend Victoria. Reverend Victoria recommends you writing how you feel after you read each one of the turning points.
I started reading but the one turning point that made me stop and write in a thoughtful way was this one: #5. "Recovery isn't changing who you are. it is letting go of who you are not." Reverend Victoria
I wrote on my notes app on my iPhone because the thoughts were coming in fast. And I'm sharing what I wrote without editing it because it's powerful just the way it is.
"For so long I was always on the defense because that’s the way I had to be because of the environment I grew up in.
I had to be violent because of the town I lived in, because of the schools I went to, because my father beat my mother and in return she beat me.
I had to keep living my life like nothing happened because that was my way of covering up my abuse.
I drank to fit in my family, friends, and environment. I DIDN’T KNOW ANY BETTER.
I talked ghetto because my friends talked ghetto.
I was the environment that I was in.
But I’m no longer in that environment, I no longer go to that school, I no longer live in THAT town, I’m no longer friends with THOSE friends. I’m no longer seeing my dad beat my mom. I NO LONGER NEED to defend myself from no one.
I’m in a completely different environment. An environment where I experience peace, love , compassion, and friendship.
But because for so long I was in THAT environment I brought all that to THIS environment.
I don’t have to act up, I don’t have to talk ghetto, I don’t have to pretend to like things that I’m not interested in just to fit in or be “cool.”
I can be me who I’ve always been before the abuse, before the friends, before the violence, before all that stuff that changed me to survive that environment.
I’m safe now. I’m safe again. I’m in a different environment where I no longer need those defense tactics.
I can release that and let go because I don’t need that here or where I’m going. I’m safe.
I can finally be in tune with peace, love, and joy.
I can put my guard down and just be open and transparent and love without being afraid.
I might have to keep reminding myself that I’m no longer where I was and I don’t have to be hard anymore. I can be gentle and kind.
I try to remember the time when I felt safe as a child and remember what I was like just for that moment. And I try to be that moment right now, here in my new environment.
I’m safe. I’m okay. I don’t need to be hard any more. I’m safe. I’m okay. I don’t need to be mad angry or violent anymore. I’m safe. I’m okay. I survived all that and I’m living to see another day. I’m safe I’m okay I can be happy and free to be who I’ve always wanted to be without caring what other people think of me. I’m safe. I’m okay. I can be kind, happy, loving and caring. It’s okay to show love and to be sweet. It’s okay to put your guard down it’s okay to love and be loved. It’s okay.
I’m safe. I’m okay. I’m living to see better days I’m living to experience other days.
I don’t need to be hard. Environments matter.
And although my kids are older and I’m just now figuring out that I don’t have to be how I was but who I am. I’m going to make the change now because it’s never late to be better and do the right thing." -Me, Janet Ornelas
I now have the resources to change my ways, my thoughts, my beliefs, and even my environment. I now know that I am responsible for how I respond to what happens to me. I now know I am responsible for my actions and how I move forward. I now know that I can stay in victim state or survivor state. I now know that my environments matter and to choose wisely the people that are in it. I forgive myself for the way I responded. I know now that I responded in that way because I was a child and I didn't know any better but I am no longer a child. I am an adult who has everything that I need at my fingertips to change my life for the better.
I encourage you to read books like these because they can change your life! I highly recommend this book to any woman. You do not have to be a woman of color. I am not a woman of color and I gained so much from this book because I gave it a chance and applied the principles that I learned here into my life.